31 October 2012

Re: Turbaconducken & C's High Hopes for the Future



S -

TURRR-BAY-KON-DACKUHN! 


This is possibly the meanest thing you have ever done to me - although in retrospect, I totally deserve it for casting the first stone. 

I have had a taste of my own medicine and Lord, it is a bitter pill to swallow. :( 

On that note, something else that's been a bitter pill for me to swallow: This picture of Lauren Conrad, whose hair is equal, perfect amounts of ombre, curl, color and length. 

Observe:

I NEED YOU, LAUREN CONRAD'S HAIR. COME TO MEEE..


Have you heard of Visa payWave (I promise I'm still on the same page), where you basically get to wave your credit card at things you want to buy and it automatically deducts the amount from your account? 

Well, I am eagerly awaiting the day things get so advanced that I get to wave my hair at this image of Lauren and automatically get the length and pigmentation deducted into the exact replica of Ms. Conrad's luxuriant mane. 

Exactly like Visa payWave ... only better. 

Optimistic for the Future,
C


P.S. Thanks for the emergency numbers (you are such a helpful little bean!), but I'm pretty sure dialing 999 doesn't work around these parts. My local emergency number is 6 digits long (OHGODWHY) and heck if I know what it is - I have trouble keeping more than 5 birthdays logged into my brain at any given time, so ... you know ... I'd be about as useful as that turbaconducken in an emergency.

P.P.S. On second thought, at least eating a turbaconducken fills you up. It probably would be really useful in an emergency...

P.P.P.S. Sorry about all the Post Scripts, BUT WHY IS IT SO HARD TO STOP SAYING TURBACONDUCKEN?

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